Confidently OUT provides topics, ideas, possibilities, recommendations on having and living an exceptional LIFE. 
Be informed and aware of your potential and possibilities!
If you have any questions, submit them to gayl@confidentlyout.com
For all the information and articles go to www.confidentlyout.com
Is This a Detour or The Right Road?
Imagine this:
You are traveling on a familiar road. You’ve traveled this road so many times. You are very familiar with rest stops, restaurants, gasoline stations, and other points of interests along the way. You know what to expect.
However, something happens that causes you to take a detour, i.e. roadwork construction, a wreck, a flash flood, etc. Whatever the reason, a road closure has forced you to take a detour. more…
Bettie Naylor, A Legend and Hero, Passed Away
According to one of Bettie’s closest friends, Carol Smith Adams: “She was everybody’s hero. She was going to be who she was. Everyone wanted to pattern their lives and work ethic after her. Everyone loved her so much, and even people who were anti-gay rights came around because they loved her.”more…
Want to be Attractive? Wear Some Confidence
Confidence is probably one of the most potent secret ingredients to being attractive! Believing in yourself exudes quality and character and catches the attention of many admirers. In fact, regardless of whether you are straight or gay, one of the most highly rated turn-ons in polls is confidence.more…
Ask Gayl
Dear Gayl,
I am in love with a married woman. We meet once a week for lunch or dinner; there has not been any physical intimacy, but we have such deep conversations. She tells me her marriage is on the rocks and that they will probably divorce soon. I want our relationship to be more than a once a week outing. Do you think I should tell her how I feel?more…
Dear Gayl,
I need to break-up with my girlfriend because I just can’t see us having a future together. First, we are not in sync whatsoever. I have a fabulous job, workout 5 times per week and enjoy working on a few hobbies. She has very little ambition, doesn’t like her job, and sits on the couch from the time she gets home until she goes to bed watching sports on TV. It drives me nuts! But sadly, more than anything else, I’m not in love with her. How do I break-up with her? I don’t want to hurt her; she is actually a very nice person. more…
Dear Gayl,
My partner passed away 13 months ago from breast cancer. We were together for 8 years. I am feeling the need to force myself to meet new people. I am really nervous about getting back into the “dating game”. What do I do first? How will I know if someone is interested in me? How do I ask someone out? I guess I need a refresher on the basics.more…
Tips for First Dates or Date Tips in General!
Are you an expert at having first dates? Are you wanting to progress to a second date, but you keep doing something to blow it? If you are ready to relinquish the title “First Date Expert”, consider these tips: more…
ASK Gayl
Dear Gayl,
I have a social hang-up. I get cold feet when it comes to meeting people. I can be at a party and see someone I would like to meet, but I just freeze-up. I absolutely feel like I have cement shoes. What can I do to overcome this paralysis? more…
Who Are You Attracting?
When having conversations with single people, the topic of finding the right person usually comes up. I have heard many dating horror stories. If you have ever had a bad date, then your description could be something like these: “worst nightmare, poster child for obnoxious bully, all- about-me princess, snob deluxe, self-absorbed maniac, lizard lips, wound-up yoyo, condescending queen, and octopus. “ And of course, the accompanying horror stories are usually very entertaining!
Everyone would like to find the perfect match. Why is finding your mate such a difficult ordeal? Why does it seem to be like mission impossible? Then, why are you repeatedly attracting the “wrong” people?more…
Ask Gayl
Dear Gayl,
I am in a new relationship with a really neat girl, Bella. Everything is going great. However, there is something I am concerned about. If we have any disagreement we do pretty good on working things out, except when it is about her best friend, Marcy. It’s like a grenade goes off. I feel like Bella chooses Marcy over me.
Don’t you think it’s absurd that Bella always answers Marcy’s calls regardless of what we are doing? They do everything together such as: play sports together, go have drinks together, go visit their friends’ together, plus they have the same friends. They have been friends for years. I do not feel included nor am I asked to join them. I love Bella and want to figure this out. I think Bella wants our relationship to work. Any suggestions? more…
The Next 260 Weeks
Where will you be in five years from now? How would you feel if your life is exactly the same in five years? Is there enough time to do what you would like to do? What could you do in the next 1,825 days?
“Don’t say you don’t have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Louis Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson and Albert Einstein.” ~ H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
When looking down the road to five years, you believe you would be perfectly happy if your life remained the same as it is today, congratulations! You are in the minority. more…
Revving Your Motor
Have you ever felt that you were at the starting line, revving your motor, but you could not move? Your foot could not step on the accelerator when it was time. The only sign of any kind of vibration was the exhaust spot smudged on the pavement!
Coming OUT for many people is a similar feeling. Picture this scenario: You are ready… all dressed up… been working on your scripts…then you look in your wallet and you don’t have any cash… oh no, that would mean stopping at an ATM machine… you decide that’s too much trouble… whew! You almost walked out the door! Thank goodness you stopped yourself from opening that door and walking out! Yea… Another safe and familiar evening at home by yourself!more…
Ask Gayl
Dear Gayl,
I recently came out and I don’t know how and where to meet people. I am in my mid thirties and went through a messy divorce. At this stage, I am not interested in having a relationship. I need to find friends. Can you give me direction on how to meet other lesbians?
Dear Lacy,
Meeting people is a frequently asked question by “newbies”. Just like meeting friends in the straight world, there are similarities on how to meet lesbians.more…
What Are You Waiting For?
Making resolutions and not keeping them is the norm for most people. But it certainly doesn’t have to be that way! As Will Rogers said…”Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.”
To get you started on making this An Exceptional Year, I encourage you to practice Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits for Highly Effective People. Stephen Covey is one of the most prolific leadership authors of our time.
To refresh your memory or to introduce you to the 7 Habits, the following provides the key points of each habit.
The first three habits focus on self mastery: more…
Newton’s List
Do you consider yourself to be a principled person? Someone who is guided by a certain set of values? You wake up every day and try your damnedest to practice and live by your principles?
I am one of these people. I live practicing my principles and values. And, like everyone else, I am not always a 100% successful in my efforts. In fact, those closest to me remind me when I screw up. more…
Stop Scaring Yourself!
Most of us have a fairly clear understanding about what it means to criticize ourselves. We have lots of experience in doing negative self-talk. Hell, for most people it’s a bad habit. For instance, we start our day by looking in the mirror at our imperfections…wrinkles, droopy eyelids, shaggy eyebrows, graying hair, circles under the eyes, zits, and on and on. Then when we put on our glasses, we start the process all over! And lord help us when we look in a full length mirror! more…
Greatest Love
Have you ever woken up at 3am thinking about something, worrying about something, having an anxiety attack, sweating, agitating, coughing, whatever. Well, I woke up at 3am recently, but it was not for any of the regular reasons. I had Whitney Houston singing “Greatest Love of All” in my head for at least an hour. Now, I ask you, what was that all about?! more…
Ask Gayl
Periodically, I will post some questions you all have asked me. If you want to email me a question, go right ahead. I will post it anonymously, don’t worry. You can send it to gayl@confidentlyout.com. Here’s the latest:
Question:
I am a parent who has recently come out. I have two children; one is 15 and the other 12. I am divorced from their father. How do I come out to my teenagers?
Mary
Answer:
Hi Mary,
I had a very similar situation when I came out. I had (I still have, but they are older) two daughters who were 17 and 11. They were very involved with school activities and having fun with their friends. I was truly concerned about “scarring” them for life! Plus, I did not want them to reject me.
Here are my suggested guidelines to Coming Out to Children: more…
Is Your Image Working For You?
I’m going to let you know something about me… I have an image problem!
My entire life, maintaining a certain image has been a really a big deal to me! Keeping Up Appearances was important! I had to meet certain expectations and look the part! Whether it was the excelling student, the faithful church-goer, the dutiful daughter, the popular girl in school, so forth. I was on a mission. So why was this necessarily a problem? <more>
People Come Into Your Life For A Reason… A Season or Lifetime
Have fun watching and listening to this video about Confidence and Believing in Yourself!
I am a Big Fan of The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. This video presents the the Agreements in a very clear and simple way. Enjoy the presentation.
If you have never failed, you have never lived!
Turn up your speakers. Sit back and enjoy the message!
Often, the happiest people in the world don’t have the best of everything…they just make the best of everything! Start Living Your Best Life Now.
via Life Is Like Coffee
Dear Gayl,
I am in love with a married woman. We meet once a week for lunch or dinner; there has not been any physical intimacy, but we have such deep conversations. She tells me her marriage is on the rocks and that they will probably divorce soon. I want our relationship to be more than a once a week outing. Do you think I should tell her how I feel?
